Crohn’s and dating: ‘First Dates’ shows what it’s like

Crohn’s disease and ulcerative colitis can affect every aspect of your life, including love and romance. And if you happen to be single, having IBD can make you feel insecure about dating. You may wonder whether a potential partner will accept the fact that you have a chronic disease.

A recent episode of the British reality show First Dates showed what it can be like. Scroll down to watch the clip.

In the episode, Ruth, age 29, explains that she’s ready to meet that special someone after a period of dealing with Crohn’s disease. She had surgery for the condition last year and now has a colostomy bag that she named “Mike.” She chose a man’s name because in her view, men are full of … well, you know.

Her attitude is positive and she says getting her disease under control has “given me a new lease on life.”

“It’s changed who I am,” she says. “I wouldn’t be the girl sitting in front of you if I hadn’t had the surgery.”

She’s looking for someone who can keep up with her high energy level and hold his own against her sharp wit.

As for romance, Ruth hasn’t had the best luck so far. She explains that she’s dated nine men in the past year but has trouble getting past the fourth date or so.

“You just don’t hear from them,” she says. “You get massively ghosted.”

On this first date, Ruth meets a guy who show lots of interest, understanding, and compassion. He’s a big fan of her positivity.

But are they a good match? Ruth doesn’t seem so sure. At the end of the episode, we learn that she found him a bit loud and felt that he was talking at her rather than to her.

Watch the video:

It’s interesting that Ruth made the bold decision to bring up her condition on the first date. Some people like to get the information out there right away, before developing emotional attachments, in case the other person turns out not to be understanding. But many others wait a bit later to have the discussion, hoping to first figure out whether there is a connection.

There’s no right or wrong approach, but it’s always a good idea to determine whether you can trust a person before sharing highly personal information. When you have a chronic disease, the screening process becomes perhaps more important than ever, and you need to choose someone who can be supportive and handle the ups and downs of your condition.

The episode was not the first time a “First Dates” participant had Crohn’s disease. In 2017, Mandy went on a date and fell ill during dinner. Her date had no problem with her health condition and was eager to see her again.

“I don’t judge anybody because of something like that,” he said. “I’m not put off by her ailment. It’s more about her, herself, and she seems a nice person.”

Unfortunately, Mandy, like Ruth, didn’t feel a spark.

Watch the clip:

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